The Case of the Drunken Beach Ho
A Semi-Fiction Novel
By.... Peter Hill
Whistling to the tune of “I’m a’ just a’ sittin’ in a jail cell”, I wonder how long I’ll be in jail for this time? It used to be a
couple days, sometimes a couple months. Other times it’s a few months and two years probation. All that stuff was so
far behind me. I pondered; it has to be this girl I kicked out of the bar. She must be mad at me for not letting her look
for her phone. I thought, what a bitch. I guess I have to deal with this human crap now. I wonder how long I’ll be locked
up for this time? Its probably going to be longer than before, just because I’m Not Guilty.
I hear some chatter outside the cell. It’s been a few hours and I still have not been told I am under arrest, or what
they are charging me with. They haven’t even booked me yet! They are more than likely getting ready to move me. I’ll
bet I’m going to the 49th street hotel,(That’s code for the Pinellas County Jail) so I’ll just sit here in the little white jump
suit they put me in and go back to whistling my Jail Cell song.
Click, clank…. The cell door opens. Officer “G” says “Come on and get in the elevator.” We go down a few floors
and the doors open, ding!! (Freakin’ Star Trek again). I stand there and wait for Officer “G” to do a little paper work
with the person behind the glass enclosed counter. As I’m standing there I notice the County van pulling in. Yup, I
thought, I’m going to 49th Street. I believe 1996 was the last time I was there. I wonder what it’s like now? Guess I’m
going to find out. As Officer “G” directs me through the doors into the sally port, I notice the sun is sinking lower now.
It must be around 4:30-5pm. “Dang” I thought, “I bet I’m going to miss dinner”. Officer “G” then turns me over to the
County Officers. The County Officers Search me and then tell me to turn around. I turn around and, of course, I’m in
handcuffs again. They then direct me into the County Van with all the customary gestures like, “watch your step”,
“watch your head” and “sit down there”. While all this is happening Officer “G” is behind the County Officers waiving
his hand and shouting, “you can still talk to me, you can still talk to me”. I thought to myself this guy is weird. He has
had me in a cell for three or four hours now, I’m on my way to the County jail and now he wants to talk. Well, back in
my day, the cops usually ask you questions before they hand cuffed you, unless of course they hand to catch you.
Then you got tackled, cuffed and then they ask you questions like, “why did you run”.
Now as they close the County Van doors, Officer “G” is still waiving at me. I sit back on my aluminum bench and
think to myself, “Oh yeah, this is going to be a fun ride. So long Officer “G”. Hello County Jail”. And who the hell is this
Drunken Beach Ho?
|!Clic HERE To Donate To My Legal Woe's!
CopyRight 2017 JamDude.Com